I get up early. Not because I want to, but because that’s when I wake up. It’s still dark but somehow you can sense that the darkness is about to lift and a new day is about to begin. I go to the coffee maker and start a pot of Dunkin’ Donuts coffee, get my mug and put my sugar and creamer in it and then walk to the sunroom/office. 3 walls of windows surround me and I have to turn on the porch light to see if John remembered to cover the plants in the garden last night since it was supposed to get down to around 39 degrees. Yep, they are safe.
With coffee done and in hand, I sit down in “my chair”…you know, the one that faces the mountains and I wait. Darkness still seems to be surrounding the new day and yet I can begin to see the outlined shapes of Snert, Bliss, Farrah and Tokie in the pasture…all serenely munching on what is for now, green grass.
There is a peace that comes with watching the dawn. There is a feeling of certainty knowing that the sun will rise today just like it did yesterday. I may not yet see the sun but yet, the darkness seems to be getting less heavy, less all-encompassing, and I begin to see the ranch a bit more clearly although there has been no burst of sunlight yet. I can quietly trust and rest in the fact that the sun is coming.
I wonder if that is how people in the Old Testament felt. They could see God’s hand throughout history and yet there had been no burst of the “Son” yet. Yet, they quietly trusted and rested in the fact that the “Son” was coming.
Sunrise comes slowly! It begins to touch the tops of the mountains that are so tall they are above timberline and look bare and rugged. Then, it slowly spreads its way down to the trees and eventually it’s rays hit the valley where I live. I am talking about where I live physically and yet, sometimes “living in the valley” could describe where I live emotionally and physically as well.
It’s been that way lately. I’ve been in a bit of a valley…a valley where I KNEW the sun was going to show its rays again, and yet, the darkness seemed all encompassing. Years ago I would have panicked…I would have been depressed. To be honest, I have still had some days during this valley period when I have felt the life being choked out of me. But yet, this valley experience has been different. I guess you could say I am learning to wait, to rest, to be comforted by the fact that the God who controls the sun, moon and stars…who knows the beginning from the end….who separated the darkness from the light….has not forgotten me, has not forsaken me. The “Son” did come! Because of that fact, God’s grace surrounds me even in the darkness and I can sense, I can rest, I can feel peace knowing that the sun will shine in my valley once more.
I may not yet see the sun. But the darkness seems to be getting less heavy, less all-encompassing, and I begin to see my life and my challenges a bit more clearly. Although there has been no burst of sunlight yet, I can quietly trust and rest in the fact that the sun is coming.